In 2008, I found out I have insomnia mental issue. This happened right after my old man passed away. Every night I came home from work, the anxiety and depression in me had gone out of control. That year was just a bit too overwhelming for me. My girlfriend at the time left me when my Dad passed away for whatever reasons. Grandpa also passed away six months after my Dad’s funeral. There are many nights that I drank myself to death, just so I can have a sweet dream till the next day. I understand this method can only be temporary, I told myself every night, there is gotta be a healthier way for me.
Later during that year, I went to see a Psychiatric Doctor and I was diagnosed with insomnia mental issue. I was shocked, at the same time it was relief. I thought I may have brain tumor or something else. After the discussion with my Doctor, she prescribed me with a muscle relaxant, xanax, and a couple of other pills to help me sleep. However, I still doubt if Doctor’s treatments is the best option for me. I was only 26 at the time, telling me to take pills everyday due to sleeping problem, are you kidding me?! I stick to Doctor’s same prescription for eight years. How was I feeling? I felt like I wasn’t myself anymore. I felt like I lost my basic emotions and felt like my brain is working like a machine. Bumping into depression, no problem! Just pop one more pill. Bumping into sleeping issue, no problem! Just pop another stronger dosage of this pill! This and that! Sure, the pills themselves helped me put down the fire in me, so I can rest. I realized I was addicted to her prescription. Without the pills, all my nights will be sleepless night. And that’s my nightmare in real life! The fear of knowing that I might just lay down there without having my brain rest. It’s like leaving your car on idle forever; you know it will eventually shut down because the gas will eventually run low. But it doesn’t work like that in my case. I have had 14 days of sleepless nights because my medicine ran out. I did it on purpose, I didn’t want to see myself to live on pills and watch my own kidney fail when I get to age of 40.
I know I gotta find a better way to live this life better, not by taking Doctor’s prescribed drugs. It just doesn’t seem like the best medical solution for me, especially it comes with a costly price and that is possible kidney failure. Thank God, one of my friends introduced me to try Cannabis and edible for my condition. At first, I was a bit scared cause the effects came so quick and I wasn’t ready to get my mood to manipulate by this thing yet. It was working. weed became a temporary solution from the pain and progressed into full nights of undisrupted sleep. The effects trickled into every aspect e of my life. This therapeutic treatment evolved into fully anxiety-free days and has since given me up to several months of relief from panic attacks at a time.
I enjoy living every moment now, I don’t have a sleeping problem any more and I don’t need to depend on the Cannabis treatment. Sure, Life still has its own ups and downs. I think I have more courage now to face whatever that’s coming toward me, even the unknown. Perhaps it’s the chemical imbalance in my head that made me go insane or it could be the incidents that happened in my life. I wouldn’t know but What I do know is that, Cannabis saved my life and I am happy that my friend has a big heart and provided me with this solution.
The question comes down to, I want the convenience to have them when I need them and I don’t want to pay such a pricy price tag for that small amount. It doesn’t make any sense to me, why the local dispensary store asks for so much profit for themselves when they claimed their initial intentions and principles were to help people, I found that very ironic!
Fortunately, my co-worker at the time introduced me the best Cannabis Dispensary in Canada as my regular pharmacy. I can now manage my own medicine freely, I don’t need to wait in line anymore every two weeks, I don’t need to waste my time in the traffic for getting my medicines, and most importantly I no longer need to get rip off by local dispensaries.
Big shut out for anyone who has the similar problems as mine, please don’t be afraid, we all have issues, be brave and lets face em. There is always a “Suitable” solution for anything.